01.10.09
Brothers Fighting: A Lesson In Sharing?
What happened to the old adage that having a sibling teaches you how to share in life? Why do brothers fight?
As I sit here listening to the screaming coming from our basement I wonder how I got myself into this predicament. Do they have too much? Do they have too little? Are we not stepping in as parents and helping them resolve conflicts more constructively? Is there such a thing as constructive conflict resolution without leaving some damage?
The only thing they are sharing now is a mean thirst to beat each other senseless. And, boys tend to be pretty physical (trust me, I am NOT saying girls are not physical, but boys just tend to be a bit more rough). It’s really just a matter of time before I have to run downstairs and separate them, risking bodily injury to myself while they walk away unscathed.
So what is the issue at hand this time? Well, it’s a couple of issues. First Issue: Older son went on younger son’s computer and messed with his ITunes…not tragic but still an invasion of privacy. Second issue: younger sons (aka the twins) lost older son’s memory card after they used it of course….also not tragic but pretty annoying none the less. I could go on and on with multiple issues of the day but the two aforementioned pretty much give you the flavor of the moment.
I recognize both issues at hand are an invasion of privacy. BUT both go back to sharing in a way. Older son uses younger son’s computer, younger sons use older son’s memory card. Ah Hah! So that’s how siblings learn to share? So someone please remind me….what do we, the parents get out of it????
Stumble it!
Robin Altman said,
January 10, 2009 at 10:42 pm
We parents get a big fat headache for years and years until they finally leave home and have their own families. Then, we watch as their stupid kids refuse to share, and we laugh and laugh. In other words…revenge.
CreditMom said,
January 11, 2009 at 5:22 pm
You said it! I really think it’s worse in the winter too…..I realize now that my children are not meant to be in the house. They need to be outside with no boundaries running free. There’s less opportunity to harm each other that way!
Rosie : ) said,
January 19, 2009 at 10:04 am
“What do we, the parents get out of it?” A Headache of course! lol
I have a similar problem, but it’s with my older girls. Soem days, I think they will tear each other’s hair out. They are just so different. I think girls can be very mean with words, and we don’t accept name-calling in any form athome, of course. But they say stuff in snippy, annoyed, bored, annoying voices that grate on your nerves.
I think that sending them outside is a good idea. Even if only to run aorund the block a few times. I bundle mine up, and send the boys outdoors for 1/2 hour. I used to play outside in this weather, why would I not let them the chance to do the same?
Also, the Wii has been a very nice distraction. The kids can play together, and there are so many physical things they can do. All very good.
Good luck! lol