05.13.08
Kids and Money - “$100 For Sneakers? That’s Not Bad”
Yesterday, my 14 year old and I were going shopping. He “needed” new sneakers. Of course the ones he “needed” were never destined for the sale rack. In fact, the ones he “needed” were full priced at $99.99. It took less than a minute for those $100 shoes to draw him in, like an addict in search of his fix. As he embraced those sneakers like a new puppy, he looked at me and said, “$100? That’s not bad.” And my response was, “$100? Are you kidding!!???”
So where is the problem here? Well, first, my son needs a job! Second, $100 isn’t much when it doesn’t come out of your own pocket! And third, children need to start understanding financial responsibility at a young age.
Even at 2 years old, a child can be rewarded for simple chores. As children get older, give them numerous responsibilities and credit them with allowance when the chores are completed. To make them even more independent, only offer allowance when the chores are completed without prompting or nagging. This comes in handy when you’re tired of hearing your own voice over and over again.
So did he get the sneakers? Yes he did, BUT he got them on the condition that half of the money came from his allowance. To put it in perspective it took him 5 weeks to earn those sneakers but as long as my child is holding up his end of the bargain I don’t mind meeting him halfway.
What do you think? Should I have met him halfway or should I have waited until he had the $100 on his own? Or, should I have just said NO to the $100 sneakers!?
Stumble it!
beth said,
May 14, 2008 at 8:16 am
i think if you have a good kid, an occassional splurge in the interest of being “cool” is fine. but i think buying $100 shoes or $200 jeans too regularly sets a tone for what’s important in life. couldn’t we find cool $60 shoes and donate $40 to charity? probably too altruistic for a 14 year old, but talk about it enough, and you never know!
Laura said,
May 15, 2008 at 10:19 am
As long as your kids are in appreciation of all that they receive and you can afford the $100, why not?
rita said,
May 15, 2008 at 10:44 am
you did the right thing. the 50/50 split was a great compromise. and that fact that it took him 5 weeks to earn his share makes him realize the value of money. totally support your actions here!
Nyota said,
May 16, 2008 at 4:01 pm
Having him cough up half of the money was a great idea! I wasn’t that lucky. My father (a military man) was under the impression a person only needed 2 pairs of pants, 5 shirts and 2 pairs of boots. Let’s just say that I did not get much out of my dad growing up. However, with my children it will be different. I think as long as they understand the value of a dollar, splurging is ok. Also, when they have to use some of their own money, they may think twice!
Marifer said,
May 21, 2008 at 8:05 am
Well…I think you are doing way better than my mom. My 7 year old brother gets everything he wants without having to ask twice. I’ve been telling my mom that she is ruining him for life. He is never gonna really understand the value of money. Can you share any tips on how to start educating him about money so I can share with my mom? It’ll be hard at first, I’m sure because he is not used to it, he’ll probably cry and think the world is against him, but I think it’ll be good for him in the long run. I don’t remember ever getting what I wanted when I was a little girl. Why are moms so weak when it comes to their last child, the smallest one in the family?
oh! and I think you did good by meeting your son halfway. It showed him you are there for him to support him as long as he shows some effort as well. I don’t have any kids yet, but I think that’s probably the way to go. Just like in a marriage, compromising is key.
Laura O said,
May 21, 2008 at 12:44 pm
I have a real problem with kids having “plastic”. I am a mother of two, one a preteen and I struggle with this everyday. Instead of an allowance kids should get a budget amount at the beginning of the month. In life adults have a set amount to live on each month (a salary) when that money is gone it is gone. That means we have to learn to spread it out until the next paycheck and if we know something is coming up that we need extra money for we learn to save. We do not do children justice by providing them with a plastic bottomless piggy bank. Financial lessons taught to children are aimed at providing them with skills to use later in life. They can have a credit card when they have an employment history and the ability to pay for what they purchase. Otherwise we are teaching them to spend without planning and that is not a good lesson, in my opinion. It leads to a life time of catch up and living beyond your means. Sometimes I think the “cash only” policy our parents were raised on kept us all out of trouble rather than in it!
Laura O said,
May 21, 2008 at 12:51 pm
Oh and regarding the sneakers…if he truly needs them do a 50/50 split. If he does not need them my suggestion would have been for him to pay for them 100%. It is the difference between need to have and want to have. Children need to realize the difference. It is really hard being a parent sometimes we become such “bad guys”. But it is these tough decisions that probably will be the best lessons we deliver on to them
CreditMom said,
May 23, 2008 at 9:47 am
I don’t know your mom but you might feel she is being “weak” but it is possible she has other reasons for being easier on the last child. Perhaps she has difficulty “letting go” of the last one….not sure but here are some tips for educating early on money:Start allowance very early. I pay my kids for their chores. If they work they get paid. If they don’t work they don’t get paid. When you go out, have them get used to taking a wallet. This way if they want something THEY can buy it for themselves. You’d be surprised how rewarding it is for a child to buy something with his own money that he worked to achieve. If they don’t bring their wallet either don’t buy it or buy it and have them pay you back later that day (YES, COLLECT THE MONEY FROM THEM OR YOU DEFEAT THE PURPOSE).Some people don’t agree with this but I find it works for one of my kids. Because he has too much of a laid back attitude in school and I know he has the potential, I reward him financially for grades over 90. It’s amazing how well this works and again, he needs to work for the money. Have them collect change. Start small and then take them to a bank like Commerce where they have a penny arcade. They can open up a bank account with a very small minimum and deposit half of the change and keep the rest.Sometimes it’s hard for parents to say no. We all fall into that trap occasionally but she needs to try to focus on treating money as a reward for something done and empower your brother to control his finances now otherwise he will grow up thinking it’s just another entitlement.Thanks for writing!!!
CreditMom said,
May 23, 2008 at 10:17 am
Thanks for all your responses. Seems most of you feel that the early teen years are a bit too early to begin introducing plastic. I’m going to continue to research this further and I may actually do a test!I love Laura O’s comment on budgeting for the month. That’s a terrific idea for getting them used to monthly bills.Keep the comments coming……
Judy said,
May 27, 2008 at 8:07 am
FYI - Interesting article on MSN…”Will our kids be dumb and broke?” http://articles.moneycentral.msn.com/CollegeAndFamily/RaiseKids/WillOurKidsBeDumbAndBroke.aspx
T Rod said,
May 27, 2008 at 6:51 pm
thats my mom she is so cool
first twin said,
May 27, 2008 at 10:46 pm
I think your so cool for having your own website
Kip said,
May 30, 2008 at 4:24 pm
My kids walk into a store and ask “can i get something if I’m good?”. I respond by saying you better be good and no you can’t. I totally know where you are coming from as far as buying our kids things the “need”. It’s a tough spot to be in. You don’t want to say no all the time and saying yes doesn’t teach them the importance of working for something you want. Why is it that kids these days don’t have any understanding of value of “earning”. Good job making him meet you half way.
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July 5, 2008 at 12:15 am
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