06.06.08
Keeping up with the Joneses: Peter’s House is Bigger!
My 10 year old twins had a play date at their new friend Peter’s house last week. When they arrived home I asked them if they had a good time. They answered, “Mom, Peter’s house is so much bigger than ours!” “That’s great, but did you have a good time?” “Mom, you can’t believe how big Peter’s house is and he has so much stuff in it. He has a huge plasma TV, XBox 360, Wii and a PSP. They are so rich!”
What I wanted to say and what I did say are two different things. I wanted to say, Peter’s parents are up to their eyeballs in credit card debt (his mom actually told me this!). So of course they can afford all that “stuff” when they just throw it on a credit card.
Well, I decided to restrain myself and give them the typical speech. I’m sure you know the one…being rich isn’t about money, it’s about having your health, your family and giving to people in need; money doesn’t buy happiness; it doesn’t matter how much is in your pocket, what counts is what is in your heart and everyone has different priorities in life and we shouldn’t make judgments. That ought to work, right?
But here is the scary thing; there are many families like Peters’ out there. And this influences our children every day. Here are some facts; the total amount of consumer debt (not including mortgage debt) was $2.46 trillion in June 2007. Based on the US median household income of $43,200 in 2007, the average family’s credit card balance is roughly 5% of that. And in 2007, 8.3% of US households owed $9,000 + on their credit cards. (Source: Creditcards.com, Federal Reserve). That’s a lot of “stuff”!
So what do you tell your kids when you see their values becoming materialistic based on peers? I guess there’s my favorite line I forgot to mention above…“If it’s so great at Peter’s house, then go live there!”
Stumble it!
Aaron Wakling said,
June 6, 2008 at 4:15 pm
I found your site on Google and read a few of your other entires. Nice Stuff. I’m looking forward to reading more from you.
Tim Ramsey said,
June 6, 2008 at 4:40 pm
I recently came accross your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I dont know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog.
Tim Ramsey
CreditMom said,
June 6, 2008 at 4:40 pm
Thanks Aaron…I’m just starting out and appreciate the feedback. I’ll certainly check out your site!
CreditMom said,
June 6, 2008 at 4:43 pm
Hi Tim,
Thanks for reading. I’ll be checking out your site as well!
CreditMom
Laura said,
June 8, 2008 at 1:21 pm
I think one of the hardest lessons to teach our children is appreciation….when we can afford to give our kids “stuff” it is wonderful ,but how do we teach them how very lucky they are to have two hands on parents that love them and participate fully in their lives? I don’t know. Maybe there is some after school program that they can volunteer in with less fortunate children….so they see the “opposite” of Peter’s house….
Barb said,
June 9, 2008 at 5:10 pm
I just came across your blog from Atlanta Mag. Mommy Diaries - wow - how appropriate - just yesterday, my 7 year old said he wants to be rich. I asked him why, so he spelled out “manson” - we talked and I figured out he meant “mansion”. I told him that riches are not about money and the size of the house you live in, it’s about having a healthy family(me, his dad and him) and a roof over our head and food on the table, etc…(which I am sure he heard as blah, blah, blah). But it is so hard when it seems that everyone around you has so much more than you(or so it seems to a 7 year old). We have debt, but not of an overwhelming sort, and we are trying to instill in our son, the difference between needs and wants, and delayed gratification. We just gave him a new/bigger bike, not because he wanted one, but because he really needed one and we gave it to him when the time was right, not just because everyone else had new ones…he is so appreciative of these gestures and we hope these life lessons will stick. I am going to bookmark yet another “Mom blog” Thanks.
CreditMom said,
June 9, 2008 at 5:39 pm
Hi Barb,
Thanks for bookmarking me. Glad to see there are others out there with similar issues and more importantly striving to foster appreciation in their kids!
CreditMom
Valerie said,
June 18, 2008 at 12:36 pm
This is why not coveting your neighbor’s goods was important enough to be one of the 10 Commandments. Then again, the American economy is built on coveting your neighbor’s goods. The thing to teach kids is that keeping up with the Joneses is a never ending race. You just end up unhappy every time you see something someone else has.
Sue said,
August 16, 2008 at 2:12 am
ROFL, love your last comment. Must remember that when mine grow up.
CreditMom said,
August 20, 2008 at 4:10 pm
Thanks Sue….it pretty much says it all!
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